Take a trip with me back to July of this year. I was sitting in the exhausting sun of our firework booth for work. I received a phone call from my family tossing out the idea of me moving down to Cedar City. At first i thought this was a joke. Did they not realize how my life was basically in SLC now? Did they not see what a huge and painful thing this would be for me to do? It came to my attention they were 100% serious. And at first i just shrugged it off and went on with my life. As the days went by there were things that just kept pointing to Cedar City. Things that i knew without a doubt weren't happening just by chance. So i did the unthinkable. I prayed about the move. I tried so hard to cloud my judgement and make it into a no. But the heavens had something else in mind for me. That next week was the week i learned how powerful prayer really was. I figured if i avoided asking and praying again i wouldn't get an answer. HA! What a joke! Instead i was "stalked" with the answer of yes. Finally after talking to some friends and my roommate about it, i saw the benefits. And they CLEARLY outweighed the cons. Sadly, i knew i was going to have to be strong, and keep my chin up. I knew this was going to be one of the hardest moves of my life. And boy was I right.
Once i decided to move things fell into place. I applied for a job at the start of OCT and got a call two days later that basically told me i had the job. Once that was set it was like Satan knew what joy my future would bring me by making this move. And he tried it all. There were a couple times where i just about quit. And the last 2 weeks were the worst. Thankfully with the help of friends i made it through and the issues were resolved. Day by day it became time to move. The morning of was no exception to the drama. I was walking down the stairs to get some things from the garage and slipped on a stair and re-hurt my ankle. Just enough to be totally 100% useless in loading and unloading. Then my family that came and got me ran into traffic and the u haul took longer to hook up here in Cedar then expected. I of course was freaking out because they didn't call to tell me they would be later. Finally the moment arrived of saying my goodbyes. My heart was being torn out. The night before i had to say a fast goodbye to my BMFF Gabe. So having to do it a second day was not pleasing to me. But i focused on the ending. Coming back to SLC, coming home.
As we drove that horribly boring drive i could feel parts of me slowly coming back. What i didn't know is countless people were praying for my peace of mind. Just another reason i'm so blessed with amazing friends. I cried a couple times. But the real tears happened when we pulled in to the apartment. Reality hit. This was my home for a couple years. Thankfully my Aunt got out of the car, locked it, and let me have my cry before we unpacked. Slowly its getting easier to function. But the drama is sure not stopping.
I realized something when i woke up from a horrible dream. My attitude about it being so bad is just fueling Satan's fire. It is giving him the power to control me. Sure this might not be my ideal life, but it is going to give me the chance to make my life better. He has encouraged me to be miserable just like he is. And he had me that way for days. I love my family, and i miss my friends. Those two facts can share the same brain without causing a waterfall of tears and guilt. So, here's to choking back the pain and getting over it!
Wish me luck!